Posts Tagged ‘God’

For International Women’s Day 2017

March 8th, 2017

“Jesus Without Mary”

Sometimes I feel like Mary without Jesus

Then I think we’d have no Jesus without Mary

Talk about compassion

We’d have no forgiveness

and we’d have no mercy

Would we be alive?


I think about her kneeling at his cross

I think about her kneeling at his manger

Crying in the open, crying in the open

Bethlehem newborn, hidden from Herod

Come on, Mother Mary

Give love to your baby

They finally got him

They’ve taken him away


Sometimes I feel like Jesus without Mary

Sometimes I feel like I’m nothing at all

Not just nobody, but nonexistant

I need Mother Mary to keep me standing tall

Without her I’m just marching through the desert looking for my home

Just looking for a settlement somewhere where I won’t be alone

I need my Mother Mary

I need my Mother Mary

Joyful Noizes (William & Jaki)

January 23rd, 2017

If there is a Heaven, William Onyeabor and Jaki Liebezeit are there together in jamming in an interstellar way that would blow our minds if we could only hear it. Jaki beating the drums and William on a variety of analog synths. It’s an image that makes me want to believe.


Over the last week, music lost both Onyeabor and Liebezeit to old age and illness. Onyeabor, a Nigerian mystery man who self-released eight albums in the ’70s-’80s before abandoning music after a conversion to Christianity, was a forward-thinking synth lover who combined the contemporary African pop music of his time with international dance and techno pop, almost like a Nigerian Kraftwerk. Liebezeit, a German drummer, was most famous for his time in the Krautrock group Can, but also played with Depeche Mode and studied various African forms of rhythm in his youth. One would think these two might have got along musically.


One of the first covers my band learned was Can’s “Vitamin C”. TVH’s first drummer got the rest of us into Can, and Jaki was a major part of why that group was so successful. We probably played “Vitamin C” for the first two years we did shows. Can is like the Velvet Underground in that they were more influential to people who went on to start their own bands.


William Onyeabor was an enigma, purposely. His backstory is unknown and what he did after abandoning music is largely unknown. Did he study music production in Germany? Did he study film production in Russia? Did he have an investor? Was he a successful businessman? Did he become a priest after his music career? He was a mystery even in his home country. Only in the hipster discovery of African pop music in the last fifteen years has his music been discovered. So be kind to hipsters because sometimes they do good things.


Some people may be sad that these two men have passed on but I choose not to see it that way. It is of course unfortunate for their families and friends, but both men definitely lived full, long lives (Jaki passed age 78, William age 70) and their work touched many people all over the world. Not a moment wasted in life, what else can you ask for?


How great thou art? How great thou art.

My Sweet Lord/Today Is A Killer

September 7th, 2016


Today is a killer.


I maintain that there is a God. A vindictive, petty God. He has made us in His image. He will shit on us. And the only thing you can do is climb out of bed and raise both middle fingers in the sky in defiance of Him. You have to tell Him to go fuck Himself. Because He will make your life as hellish as possible.


Being yourself will put you in a lonely place, especially if you are not like the others. You want to give love to people. You want to be loved in return. When you are not like the others, it will make you strong or it will make you whimper. Regardless, you will be rendered bitter and lonely.


People who sing to God sing because they need God. They don’t sing for the people in the pews. They do it for themselves. “God knows I need to see you but it takes so long my Lord. . . but everything today is a killer.”


And God reassured his flock, the flock that he pranked and trolled and tortured for ages, and he sayeth unto them “I will be there for you when everybody else is gone.” And sadly, many people believed that shit.

God Is A Spiteful Cat

December 17th, 2014

I’m not doing well.


I don’t know what the problem is. I don’t know what to do about the problem that I can’t understand let alone explain. Am I drained? Depressed? Overloaded? Full of blown circuits?


There is the idea that one should pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. But what if your bootstraps are old and break when you pull on them too hard. What if you don’t wear boots anyway. What if you wear slip-ons?


People forget that “pulling yourself up by the bootstraps” is actually a bullshit statement. Go ahead and put some boots on. Now, pick yourself up off the ground by pulling on the straps. Take your time. If the straps break, try the laces. Impossible, right? Not even David Blaine can do it.


You see, the “bootstrap” thing is a metaphor for an impossible thing. And yet people use the metaphor wrong. It’s like saying, “hey you make minimum wage, figure out how to subsist” or “you’re mentally ill? mentally get yourself out of it, crazypants”. Go fuck yourself if you’re that type. You’re the kind of person who would pilot your pontoon over to a drowning man after Hurricane Katrina and tell him “You should save up for a rainy day” before putting off feeling like you helped somehow.


There are people out there who believe The Secret is real and that is embarrassing. Even the Bible has a few thousand years behind it. The Secret was published in ’06. It’s frustrating when I try to be in the moment with someone and connect. I look for someone to lean on in times like these and what do I get for my troubles but wish-fulfillment fantasy? Why don’t I put my trust in a book about the ghosts of dead housecats, while I’m at it?


Believing in a ghost cat for a God would make sense in my world. I already believe 1. that God exists and 2. He hates me. How hard would it be to imagine that a house-shitting, ass-flashing, curtain-slashing feline would be mean enough to be the Lord Itself? This makes sense although I don’t want any cat lovers feeling good about themselves because cats are right bastards and God is the biggest bastard of them all.

I Almost Believe In God

December 12th, 2013

I almost believe in God. I actually want to believe but it has been difficult for me, what with all the logic and deductive reasoning and whatnot that contradicts the possibility of a belief.


There is something that logic doesn’t account for, and that is the miracle. I want to believe that there is a God because there are miracles that occur in our life that we can’t account for. I’m not talking about the impossible to believe like Jesus turning water into wine. I’m talking about the unlikely but somehow possible that is the musical career of Stevie Wonder.



Stevie Wonder, blind from birth, learned how to play more musical instruments as a child than most people can name. By twelve, he was a recording star. By age twenty-two, he had negotiated the right to creative autonomy when making his studio albums. By age twenty-six, he had recorded an double-album called Songs In The Key Of Life, which is now in the Library Of Congress.


The song above, “Add Day Sucker”, is not on Songs Of The Key Of Life. It was included as part of a bonus EP that came with that album. I don’t know why “All Day Sucker” is not on the proper Songs album. Presumably, the four songs on the bonus EP were not good enough for the proper double-album. Hard to argue. That album has “Isn’t She Lovely” which wasn’t a single.


“All Day Sucker” slays me. It is, as you might say, a stone groove. Stevie Wonder plays nearly everything on the track. There is a backup singer and three different guitarists on the track. The rest is all Stevie: drums, synth bass, keyboards, Clavinet, and those vocals.


This is a miracle to me. This song wasn’t good enough to be on one of the best albums of all time and it was entirely composed and almost entirely performed in studio by a blind man. I know Prince can play all these instruments and guitar as well, but fuck him because he at least has the gift of sight.


Miracles really do happen. They aren’t completely implausible. They seem implausible sometimes.


Why are you looking at me like that?

Why are you looking at me like that?