Posts Tagged ‘computer’

My Arm Hurts

April 22nd, 2016

My left bicep hurts. I hurt myself this morning when I was adjusting my mattress. I fell over and used my arm to keep from banging my head against the wall. I didn’t bang my hang but I pulled a muscle. What made me think I had the arms of Samson that would keep me from banging my head and also keep me from falling down? I have taken a pain reliever but that’s it. I hope this is a temporary situation.

 

My computer needed repair again. Do not buy a used computer. My used computer did not come with all the screws in it. It cost $50 to get repaired. The lack of screws caused the housing to come loose which caused the power jack to come loose and then the the zzzzz…… my god. The hinges and the screws and the power jack and used computer. Never buy a used computer.

 

Since I last checked in, Chyna and Prince died. I don’t know what to say. I enjoyed watching Chyna in the WWE. I liked a lot of Prince songs. Still do. I’ve heard more unreleased Prince songs than I’ve heard released Prince songs. I was really sad about Chyna being dead and then Prince dies and then Chyna becomes an afterthought after a few hours. I haven’t even thought about Prince yet.

 

I keep thinking about how hard it has to be when one is removed from reality and humanity. When you really need love and compassion and empathy but you can’t seem to get it at that moment. Prince was a superstar, a beloved musical legend. Chyna was a fallen star, a reality show reject who dabbled in pornography. And they both died, too young and alone. One from chosen isolation, one isolated by default.

 

I try to be kind to everybody now. I know what it’s like to need kindness and not be able to get it.

Me Without You (A Diary)

July 24th, 2014

My computer’s hard drive failed last week, so I did what I had to do: took it to the Geek Squad and toughed it out for seven days while they replaced it. I do not have a smartphone which allows me to surf the Internet, so I went cold turkey off the Internet for seven days. This is a diary of my journey, my descent into madness.

 

TUESDAY MORNING

I am giving away my baby, my computer, my window to the world. The Geeks are taking it now. They are running a diagnostic. Luckily, I have therapy today. This will be a great opportunity for more venting of impotent rage.
TUESDAY AFTERNOON

The Geeks have called me to tell that indeed my hard drive has failed and they will need to replace it. The other potential problem was a virus, which the computer could have very well had but in the end I will need a new hard drive which will come gratis via my protection plan. Now I wait.

 

WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON

It has occurred to me that I could go to a friend’s house and mooch off their connection or attend a public library for the free Internet access. I’m not going to do that. I used to do that back in the bad old days before 2007 and the librarians would look at me like I was a smelly pervert. Even if I am a pervert, I use to bathe regularly back then and I never used the library internet for anything lewd.

 

WEDNESDAY NIGHT
I might go to the library tomorrow afternoon.

 

THURSDAY NIGHT

Do you have any idea how much it sucks to have nothing to do while sitting up at night tending to an ill grandfather? What am I supposed to do? Write songs? Clean my room? Read books? Not look at pornography? What is this, Siberia?

 

FRIDAY AFTERNOON

Today I tried to masturbate to my Playstation 2 with a picture of Jessica Alba taped to it.

 

FRIDAY EARLY EVENING

It just occurred to me that no one remembers I was on Beat The Geeks. Thank God. I’d hate to hear some joke about being on that show and then something like “Bet you can’t Beat the Geek Squad, huh?” I might punch someone in the face if they said that to me, without the computer.

 

FRIDAY NIGHT

I have taken a pizza box and drawn on the inside of it to look like a laptop/notebook. The inside top that you lift up is the screen and the bottom part where the pizza sits is where I drew a keyboard with a marker. I even drew a tiny circle at the top for a webcam. I’m talking to someone on Chatroulette. It’s a girl. And she’s real! She doesn’t have a dick.

 

SATURDAY EARLY MORNING

I’m scared.

 

SUNDAY EARLY MORNING

I have mudbutt and I can’t sleep. I don’t know if this has anything to do with the Internet.

 

SUNDAY AFTERNOON

I haven’t been sleeping well. I missed a doctor’s appointment. It was at 9:30 a.m. Wednesday. Oops.

 

SUNDAY NIGHT

I am getting the hang of jerking off to the Playstation 2. I’ve changed the photo from Jessica Alba to Bobby Hull (clothed)

 

MONDAY MORNING

I called the Best Buy to see if they had the damn computer back. They don’t. I have figured it out the Geek Squad thing. They send the computer off via UPS. It takes a few days for them to get it to the place it needs to go. It takes a few minutes for them to replace the hard drive, then they send it back via UPS and it takes a few days because they reroute through a branch in Beirut.

 

MONDAY EVENING

I have nothing. I am nothing. Did you know that playing cards are a real thing and not just a thing on computer Solitaire? Do people play real-life Minesweeper, too?

 

TUESDAY MORNING

They haven’t called me. They don’t have it. Goddamn it. My life. I will have to wait another day, won’t I?

 

TUESDAY AFTERNOON

I call them. They have it. They’ve had it all day. Damn it. I could have gotten this thing hours ago. Time to go get it.

 

TUESDAY EARLY EVENING

On the way home from Best Buy, I get an automated call from the Geek Squad telling me my computer is fixed and ready for pickup. I have the computer. It’s in the car next to me in the passenger lap. Who am I kidding? It’s in my lap. I will never let it go. I will feed it milk and cookies when I get it home.

 

TUESDAY LATE EVENING

Yes, the pornbox works. We’re good.

 

WEDNESDAY MORNING

I forgot to turn on Windows Defender.